• http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

    AMAZING ARTICLE.

    And that man disgusts me. He should love his wife for who she is. Wanting her to be healthy is one thing, wanting her to look like UEE is another, completely different issue. >.<

    Personally, I don't know how qualified I am to talk about this. I'm a 15 year old girl, and I've never actually been in a relationship before, so I can't say whether I would expect my boyfriend to look like my bias or anything. But I have actually never felt any desire to have female K-pop stars bodies. Honestly…I'm not built like that, and I personally think that I actually have nicer curves than 99% of Korean women I've seen. 
    That's not to say I think they have bad bodies or anything AT ALL. Many K-pop stars have impeccable bodies…but that's what they are….THEIR BODIES. Not your's. Don't try to have their bodies, just try to love and care for your own. ^_^ It's too much stress to try to be someone else, and even if I did want to look like UEE and was able to achieve that, I don't think I would be as happy as I am being content with what I look like. :D

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/R5BKARJWK7NNOXYOIUSP76YJW4 Aj

      I love it that for a 15 year old you are amazingly sensilble.

      • http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

        Oh, thanks! ^_^ But honestly, I’m a teenage girl, so I’ve dealt with body image problems before. I have celebrities who’s bodies I admire. I wouldn’t mind looking like Beyonce. :P But I don’t mind who I am. 

        Honestly, I think that’s one of the things I like about living in the U.S. It really is a melting pot of cultures and races, which also means there’s a melting pot of body types. You aren’t alone, and other people have dealt with the same problems you have. You just need to find ways to properly manage your type of body. I mean…I honestly doubt that all Koreans have the bodies of SNSD (and really hope not). I dunno…I guess it’s just the difference between being inspired and obsessed. 

        And honestly, I’ve always been more inspired by stars who carry themselves well (i.e. Natalie Portman, Dianna Agron, Beyonce)…those are people who I admire, but I’m not obsessed with being and looking exactly like them. :)

        • http://www.facebook.com/tunmi Turayo Tijani

          I’m used to curvy women. I’m Nigerian then I moved to the US. I’m used to seeing women with flesh and curves and boobs and hips. Thanks to being in the US, I see different ethnicities and their body types but it wasn’t until I started watching kdramas that I wondered “where are curves?” There’s an article on thegrandnarrative about the S line and I’m still wondering, “where is the S?” It’s funny when I see these idols looking like runway models because it’s kinda sad. Where are your curves? That’s one of the best attributes of a woman’s body and asian women have them, this I know. It’s just weird to see them looking like pre-pubescent teenagers.

          • http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

            I know, right? I mean, I understand that the ideal in Korea is being skinny, rather than curvy, but I don’t understand why they try to pretend that K-pop stars and actresses have “S-lines”. I mean, if the ideal is being skinny so they can look young and innocent, why try to pretend that they are “sexy”? If guys find “sexy” appealing, wouldn’t they just prefer foreign stars with curvy bodies? :/

    • YourYG Bias

      *highfive*

      Personally, I can’t survive without chocolate, honey or bagels. Ironic how Korea finds all that sexy. 

      • http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

        Lol! xDD 

    • black_rose45000

      “I actually have nicer curves than 99% of Korean women I’ve seen.”
      Good one! I’m glad you think that way of yourself :)

      And for your age, you seem remarkably mature and smart. Kudos to you :)

    • Ditu3ka

      That´s a right and very mature approach you take. As someone who is twice your age I have to say it took me much longer to reach this point.

  • lemonoide

    Tiffany is fucking hideous, she looks like a mime with all that bb cream and I dont think she realizes how noticeable is all the botox she gets, also her torso is a fucking square.

    • YourYG Bias

      Uh, lol. Now that we’re talking about body image and how to appreciate people of different shapes and sizes…

      Some people think Tiffany looks great, but I’ve seen her without makeup and pre-debut which is how I’ll always see her. I can understand your comment, I guess.

  • http://www.michelle-chin.com/ Michelle Chin

    We all know it is not possible to achieve the figures and faces of our favorite idols but sometimes, these images of skinny and pretty ladies seep into our lives without knowing it. 

    When I talk to friends, they often praise about Korean superstars who have flawless skin and say that they want to have skin like them. They will talk about cosmetic procedures to enhance their looks or dieting programmes. The praising only stopped when I remind them that “Uh, these pictures are photoshopped” or “They put three layers of make up. I know it because I’ve done it before. You’ll look different from your actual self with the make up on.” 

    Then, people will nod in agreement and then say that “Ah, no wonder…”. But one week later, they’ll talk about the same thing again. = = 

    It’s quite funny how these “perfect” images of our idols can affect us this much. Unless we remind ourselves constantly that these images are UNHEALTHY, then most of us are pretty much a lost cause. I think this is why the husband will make such statements like that towards his wife. By the way, it is much worst if your parents are like that… 

    • YourYG Bias

      Anything that mass media comes out with about body image should be utterly ignored unless it has something to do with health and fitness. Lowering your body weight to a size that is disproportional to your height and lifestyle is common idiocy in society. Let yourself dictate what appearance you desire. 

      If you really want to be factual and define “beauty” with the help of science, I found a very informative read, down below. Though it was dreadful trying to comprehend facial proportions and whatnot.  

      http://majorityrights.com/weblog/comments/the_facial_proportions_of_beautiful_people/

      I kinda died inside when I saw that they were arguing about beauty with math, but I’m not a scientist so what should I know…

      • http://www.michelle-chin.com/ Michelle Chin

        Ah the golden ratio! 

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/DMPXIBHH6HLHWRKTWM5B3HH5X4 Zoe

       I really love your comment. I too need to remind friends and family (and myself) that the images of what we all see in the media have been highly altered. I think it is more difficult now than ever before thanks to such rapid advancements in technology. New technology allows graphics, enhancements and alterations to pictures that were previously impossible, thus creating a more ideal, less attainable product (e.g., “perfect beauty”). Additionally, with the widespread use of technological entertainment, we have more exposure to all of these altered images, making them seem more normal. A person may only see a few dozen everyday people in real life in one day, but, within an hour, can easily pour through hundreds of music videos, ads, and photos filled with beautiful waifs smiling coyly and flipping their flowing hair.

      I feel like it is a constant battle against the media in order to hold onto my sanity and my body confidence.

      • http://www.michelle-chin.com/ Michelle Chin

        “I feel like it is a constant battle against the media in order to hold onto my sanity and my body confidence.”I agree with this statement. It is the same for me, and for lots of people. We know it is unattainable but why do we still go after it? 

    • black_rose45000

      You remind me how at some point I was talking to mom about how women in K-dramas look like they don’t use much make-up, and they prefer the natural look. Later on I found out how surgery is such a common practice, and I, who thought they had only been confident enough to prefer the simple make-up, felt cheated.

      As for the “perfect skin”, I actually thought that a lot of people (watching Japanese shows; unfortunately I can’t say many about Korean people) had skin problems, with wholes in their skin left by dimple marks, that I wondered if it’s smth typical or not.

      That last quote pretty much said everything. In the end, the entertainment and beauty industries have to gain from this, only them.

      • straighttohelvetica

        The make-up is a vicious cycle, too. Idols wear make-up to make their skin look perfect and clear, but the heavy make-up messes up their skin. So then they have to put on more make-up and so on. I watched an interview once where Ryeowook said he doesn’t even want his own parents to see him without make-up because his skin has gotten so bad. 

        • black_rose45000

          Tsk. with all the make-up, incessant hair-dying, and unnatural life style, they keep ruining their bodies :3

      • http://www.michelle-chin.com/ Michelle Chin

        My sister said that with HD tv, she found that most Korean superstars have pretty bad skin. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/asha.bradford Asha Bradford

        I spent a year in Japan. I found that in comparison to the average person in North America, the Japanese people I saw all year had really terrible skin. I’m honestly not sure why. I even noticed that my skin started to get really bad after a month or two. It’s cleared up a lot since coming back to North America. I wouldn’t compare Japanese skin issues to other countries personally.

        • black_rose45000

          That’s very interesting, and all the more intriguing. Maybe we’ll find an explanation to that sometime. Thank you for telling me that, I wasn’t really sure since I’d never been to Japan and got into contact with real people, so a second opinion is very welcomed.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/R5BKARJWK7NNOXYOIUSP76YJW4 Aj

    I was never skinny and I accepted the fact that I’ll never become one. Though I do feel a twinge of jealousy whenever I see a picture of Lee Hyori who is way older than me  but I usually get over it .This guy pisses me off and the wife should really do something or this husband would just continually bulldoze her.It is crazy.I can understand that anyone would be envious with these super skinny bodies Kpop idols have but I wish they wouldnt be obsessed about it.They are people that starve to look that way which I think is very unhealthy being skinny doesn’t necessarily mean that you are fit. For some of us that works regular office hours working out like they do would be impossible. And we have to remind ourselves that they are idols they are suppose to look that way beacuse that’s just how it is in Kpop while we are just ordinary people who doesnt need to look that way since we dont have photoshoots or TV guestings.

  • goldengluvsk2

    first of all, let me say that the husband in “Hello” deserved a kick to the crotch…YES.. right THERE… you want UEE? THEN YOU SHOULD EFFING MARRY UEE DUMBASS! I dont know how the woman is married to that guy really… id be filing for divorce in the exact second he tells me i have to look like UEE to be with him… i’d like to know how he would feel if his wife told him she wants him to be as tall as dbsk’s Changmin and to have Daesungie’s hot body? he’d be crying in a corner… T_____T

    now, I dont really understand why people say they want to look like ___ and go as far as undergoing surgery because they want to have ____’s nose— O__o it may be because im terrified of knives and feel it would hurt terribly but you cant simply have X’s nose! its her/his nose! their mom and dad should be proud of their artwork but YOUR nose is like it is… accept it! It also has to do with the family of the person, I once watched a documentary when a girl in SK said her mother told her she should undergo surgery to look pretty I was like: O__o no wonder why some teens are not happy with themselves… their parents reinforce that thought that they should be “pretty” and fit in the stereotypes no matter what…
    theres always stereotypes ruling our existence, if we’re short, if we’re tall, if we’re skinny if we’re not skinny… how our skin should look flawless… everything in one way or another is determined by people we dont even know… someone said “blonde girls are stupid” OR “blonde girls are hotter” and then everyone believes that… we all have our days when we feel insecure about ourselves BUT those are the exception not the rule.

    • http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

      Yeah, I was horrified when I read some article like “T-ara’s Eunjung’s Face Most Popular for Plastic Surgery”… O___O

      • goldengluvsk2

         ikr? O__o eunjung is EUNJUNG… people cant have her face O__o  i was like: they have molds of eunjung’s face or something?… I imagined something a la Face/Off… creepy !! x.x

    • black_rose45000

      ” THEN YOU SHOULD EFFING MARRY UEE DUMBASS!”
      I thought the same lol! But I doubt UEE would even look at him >:D

      As for him crying in a corner, I doubt that. I bet he feels great about himself, whether he’s well-built or not. This type of men is like Shindong (“it’s okay cause I’m a man”), and they feel entitled to demand the girl to look great enough for their midnight fantasies.

      The story you mentioned about that girl and her mom, reminded me how recently I read smth about Baek Ji Young complaining in a show how ugly she was before plastic surgery (the hosts told her she looked ok so I have no idea if she exaggerated or not, but that’s not the point, at the end of the day, no one can change the opinion you have of yourself) and she said she wouldn’t know what to do if her future daughter looked like that. And that left me really disappointed tbh.

      • goldengluvsk2

         yes, I thought that if a man had a girl telling him 24/7 he should buy steroids to build muscle and look like ___ he would feel uncomfortable too but as you pointed out the men like the “husband” are like that… they have their self steem reaaally high up int he sky and unlike her, he would def dump her in the blink of an eye if she asks him to do that…

        woww the story about baek ji young is shocking and dissapointing indeed… it looks like she would tell/suggest her daughter to undergo surgery without a doubt if she isnt “pretty”… :S and like this, there are many many many mothers/fathers that indirectly or directly criticize their kid’s looks with no mercy :S

        • black_rose45000

          Yep! And since few men are adepts of serious relationships and most switch girls like socks…it wouldn’t be surprising.

          Yeah! that was my exact thought, like “Oh, I know what you’d do, you’d introduce her to your plastic surgeon”. Honestly, I was raised with my mom telling me that I’m beautiful to her no matter what (whenever I complained about myself), and that’s normal for parents to think. I hope more parents there inspire that to their kids, so that their kids pass it on as well.

  • Nabeela

    loved it Dana! lay it on em hard! 

    • Dana_SB

      Nabeela, you’re kind of my favorite <3

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/DMPXIBHH6HLHWRKTWM5B3HH5X4 Zoe

    This husband is absolutely amazing. He reminded me of the Men’s Rights Group complaining about Baek Ji Young’s “Good Boy”. I especially enjoyed the pearls of wisdom: “Even during a time where men ruled the world, men never treated women like dogs.”

    The husband should get together with the group. He will need the company when his wife leaves him.

  • cecedee

    “So gentlemen, please don’t tell your lady that she should in any way,
    shape, or form resemble a Korean pop star; if she has any sense at all,
    she’ll either demand that you somehow morph into Taecyeon or get rid of you for your astounding lack of common sense.”

    well said. It’s Eunhyuk for me tho~
    It’s frustrating how some people be this shallow..physique demand in korea is scary I think..

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nate-Broadus/100003245734823 Nate Broadus

    “Idol” has to be the most apt word to describe the entire K-pop fan phenomenon. I’ve never seen people elevated to the level that idols are among the most rabid sector of their fandom. You would think they crap gold, or levitate above the ground and never touch the same Earth all the regular people tread. It’s almost cult-like how some K-pop idols are deified — which, while entertaining at first, can quickly reach a point where it starts to get scary.

    The husband mentioned in the article is scum. He is exactly the kind of (so called) man that makes real men just a little ashamed he comes from the same gender. Badgering his wife into losing weight is bad enough, but bringing up a K-pop idol as an example that he would like his wife to emulate just nosedives right into scumbag territory.

    I agree with the article: NO real woman should ever aspire to emulate a K-pop idol — certainly not in terms of body shape. 

    As the article pointed out, there is a reason why K-pop idols are forced (and yes, they are forced) to maintain such ridiculous figures — because it is a huge factor in determining their success or failure in the profession they have chosen. K-pop places a massive amount of importance on how you look, same as modeling. In order to be successful, you have to fit the ideal that the industry has created about what a K-pop idol must look like. You have to have an almost anorexic figure, something athletically a step above heroin chic, in order to achieve the idol look. This is something idols obviously have come to terms with in their pursuit of fame. But that is an idol’s unfortunate cross to bear in an industry that places a premium on physical appearance. 

    A healthy woman, an everyday woman, does not need to subject themselves to the same unrealistic body pursuits. Taking care of yourself is one thing, killing yourself in order to have the “perfect” non-existent waistline and stick thin legs is quite another. 

    The great irony of this whole thing, is that even idols can’t always live up to the facade of an idol. They have blemishes. Not all of them are as happy as they may seem in photo shoots. There are more than likely times they wish they could have as normal a life as the people who worship them like they were chiseled from marble. But the greatest proof that even an idol can’t live up to the idol image is the fact that they are touched up and photoshopped in almost every piece of promotional material that exists. 

    Think about that for a minute. These “perfect” idols aren’t even perfect enough for the photographers who doctor the results to be even more unrealistic! Is this really the archetype a healthy woman should aspire to become?

    Anyway, the guy is an idiot. His wife’s figure should not be his concern. If she wants to be healthy and look better, great. But constantly trying to drive her toward it, no matter what lame excuse he concocted, is disgraceful.

    Ladies, take care of yourselves. At least to the point where your health isn’t an issue. But don’t let a half-man like the one above shove you toward an absolutely absurd body type. It isn’t realistic. It isn’t healthy — mentally or physically. 

    • black_rose45000

      A+++++++++

  • aratin

     The deifying of idols is indeed scary. It is astonishing how people have
    bought into the Kpop myth. It is no longer the teeny boopers, it seems a
    lot of Korean society is possessed by it. Watching Korean TV, you are
    bombarded with ad after ad, of idols promoting things not commonly
    associated with music acts – from fridges to chicken. There is this
    false sense of national pride that Kpop is somehow putting Korea on the
    map, making them a global presence, when frankly it is just an internet
    presence. However, I will leave that argument to another day.

    Kpop produces this cult like environment, where the idols are seen as
    perfect, no matter what, no questions asked. Consider, the recent
    controversy showing SNSD’s Sooyoung’s anorexic/skeletal figure. Yet,
    their fans are up in arms screaming that it is all due to her
    metabolism. Even when old photos show she has indeed lost a lot of
    weight and looks unhealthy, they continue to argue that she eats a lot,
    as if they were in the room while she is eating. All this to say, Kpop
    fans exist in a subset of fandom that is crazier than anything I have
    witnessed in any other fan culture.

    Kpop sells the artist, not the music. It sells the individual, that is
    why idols can release the same mediocre products over and over again,
    and their fans will continue to buy multiple copies. You have an
    industry that specifically caters to adult men who love underage female
    idols; the ajussi fan.

    The deeper one goes in this Kpop world, the more unsavory and
    unsatisfactory it gets. Maybe staying in the shallow end, with all the
    pretty colors, synchronized dancing and lip syncing to music backup, is
    the best way to enjoy it after all.

    • black_rose45000

      “they continue to argue that she eats a lot, as if they were in the room while she is eating.”
      After finding out abut the lengths to which fans go to stalk their idols, I wouldn’t be surprised if these ppl were really informed on her alimentation regime.

      I agree with your comment, especially the last paragraph :|

    • Ditu3ka

       Your last paragraph summarizes it all.

  • black_rose45000

    “f she has any sense at all, she’ll either demand that you somehow morph into Taecyeon or get rid of you for your astounding lack of common sense.”
    ROFL! Good one!

    With the risk of being flamed for saying something irrelevant (I know, I know, we talk about sparkly K-pop and Korean society here), the other day I watched a documentary on how people from Mauritania deemed women of large sizes (and I mean, really large) as beautiful, and a symbol of wealth and pride (and they had a saying, that a woman’s size indicates her spot in her husband’s heart). The women had been force-fed since childhood, and they applied the same treatment to their daughters too, despite the suffering they were subjecting them too. While I don’t agree with any of these two cultures’ mentality, I’m trying hard to understand them and their ideal of beauty, and what’s even harder, accept them.

    It’s an entirely different thing when you have someone else treat you the way that man treated his wife, though; it’s frustrating and angrying. The worst thing is, when you’re part of such a society, you have to abide by its rules; you may refuse to do so, but you’ll have to fight a lot of people at that cost. Skinny is shameful in Mauritania, and Fat is ridiculed/demeaned in S. Korea.

  • Ditu3ka

    “if I had a friend who was as skinny as UEE…well, then my friend would probably be UEE” – that just made my day  – ROFL!

  • http://twitter.com/M_Wys Michaela Wylie

    Something I forgot to type earlier is this quote I once read in Seventeen magazine: “Photos are 2D; beauty is 3D.” I love this quote…I think so many people should be reminded of that.

    …Unfortunately K-pop stars are sold on their appearances through photos, but that quote is such a self-esteem booster for me. ^_^

    Anyways, I find it interesting that the majority of South Koreans idolize their bodies, when a lot of us American fans will comment: “Oh, he/she looks too skinny; I hope they’re eating.” My bias is Changmin from DBSK, and although he’s looked so hot since HoMin came back as a duo in 2011, I was a bit disappointed when he said he was on a diet. Honestly, that man is over 6 feet tall and clearly has a fast metabolism, so as long as he’s eating healthy, he should be fine (as is with most K-pop stars). 

    In my personal opinion as a fan, too, he was a bit more attractive from late 2008-2010-ish, when he seemed to be building muscle and not be too skinny. I remember being pretty horrified when these male idol group height/weight charts came out. TVXQ was ranked “giants” in height but only “not average” for weight chart. If you want to see those articles, here they are:
    http://www.allkpop.com/2012/03/whos-the-skinniest-and-heaviest-among-male-idol-groups 
    http://www.allkpop.com/2012/03/netizen-posts-the-average-heights-of-k-pop-boy-groups 

    …I think both of them were DB5K, though. :)

    But my point is: it’s actually unattractive to me how skinny some idols are. And obviously, some of them are just naturally more thin than others, but…still. All of them could afford to gain some weight, in my opinion. (…Except maybe Shindong. :P) Say what you will about 2PM, but at least they seem very healthy. I know that so many girls are too thin, but I think the males are somewhat ignored sometimes, because the majority at least appear to be fine. (Or look pre-pubescent…will SHINee ever look old? >.<) 

    Honestly, don't they already have enough stress in their lives? D:

    • idontknoe

      I agree completely except that 2pm does probably have to do a lot to maintain muscle. They have to intake a lot of lean foods in order to gain muscle mass without gaining fat. Everyone can gain muscle, but six packs are a result of a combination of muscle and reduction of fat.

  • destined2bebossy

    Saw this episode (cause f(x) were there) and had no idea he said that (though I knew it was something aweful by the audiences reaction).
    That is ridiculus for him to expect her to look like Uee and for any other person to expect themselves to look like an idol. Like you said, its their job to look this way. Half of what we see of them is not how their face/body really looks when they’re at home eating a sandwich watching tv anyway.

  • asianromance

    “if she has any sense at all, she’ll either demand that you somehow morph into Taecyeon or get rid of you for your astounding lack of common sense.”  —  hear hear!    If he wanted someone Uee’s weight, then he shouldn’t have even started dating his wife.  She could have married a man, and not an overgrown fanboy. 

    ” that prior to her weight loss, store keepers had paid no attention to his wife “– if this is consistently true, then I feel really sad for people in South Korea. Everyone is contributing to his husband’s demands that his wife stay at Uee’s weight.   If he was a good husband, he would confront those store keepers for being size-ist.    

    I hope there are writers like you in Korea writing about this and condemning that horrible husband for doing this to his wife.  And I hope the korean blogosphere rip that man to shreds.  It seemed like while the audience wasn’t too chill with that husband making those unreasonable demands.  

  • Literati Tempo

    I think people also forget the power of Photoshop and makeup. Very seldomly do we get to see the stars as they truly are.  PS is no joke it can make anyone look like they have a S-line and mile long legs. Look at them in person with no makeup and normal clothes and sure they would look pretty but even they pale in comparison to their made-up stage personas.

    • CJux

      Every woman and man should watch this youtube video of this guy who used to be a digital retoucher (not sure if still is):

      “I’m a part of the media machine that has suckered you into thinking that you should to look like this perfect, flawless person that does not exist anywhere in the entire world”

  • Eliza Carter

    THANK YOU.

    This has pretty much summed up all my thoughts about this matter. So many young kpop fans are fighting negative body images, due to the beautiful men and women of kpop that they have been exposed to. T_T And many don’t realise that it’s unrealistic to be like them- after all, idols don’t have the same commitments as their fans.

  • Triinu

    I take issue with the statement that a weight of 75 kg is “not terribly healthy” and the implication you make that being overweight is unconditionally unhealthy. First of all, weight is not the be-all, end-all determiner of health. SO many other factors contribute to health: food, exercise, psychology, environment (physical and social), etc. People who qualify as overweight can be significantly healthier than those in the normal weight category. I am 173 and a year ago I weighed exactly 75 kg, which made me overweight, but I was still able to athletically outperform most of my normal weight friends. 

    On a similar note – being underweight is not necessarily unhealthy either. 

    As for you saying that you would “drag your [skinny friend] to the the nearest Burger King” – please shut up and stop policing other people’s bodies. Even if it’s just hypothetical. It’s not cool – it is both physically and, even more importantly, psychologically unhealthy for your friend. Also – are you really saying that it is better for your friend to eat the crap at fast food restaurants than be thin(ner than you deem appropriate)?

    • Amber Skowronski

      ^ This. 

    • mangochic

       I think you are overeacting. She meant it as a figure of speech. I am sure she wouldn’t take them there, she would advise her friend to eat more to be healthy which would show she is concerned for her friend and not the weight police.

      It is also risky to be too thin that’s why anorexics have major issues.

      • Triinu

        You are perpetuating the same problematic patterns of thought that made me post my comment in the first place. 

        It is no one’s business what someone else does to their body or what their body looks like. Unless someone asks for your advice on what to put in their mouth, keep your own mouth shut. Unless someone ASKS for your opinion on their body or their health, keep your mouth shut. And even if they do ask, it is better to keep your mouth shut, because you have no right to regulate other people’s bodies – not even in your own thoughts. 

        Doing things like that without permission and out of “concern” is called concern trolling. 

        For goodness’ sake – there is a VERY BIG difference between being naturally thin and starving yourself to get there. Anorexics have health problems because they don’t get enough nutrients to feed their body, not to mention all the psychological stress worrying about food and their weight puts on it. People who are just thin (because of their fast metabolisms or lifestyle choices, not because of an eating disorder) are at far less risk of any health complications than anorexics for obvios reasons. Anorexia is a *disease*. Thinness is not. (And neither is fatness.) 

        I realize that the statements in the article have not been made with malice in mind, but that does not make them any less problematic or wrong. People should be called out on things like these. The less people are made to notice how these seemingly small and powerless comments on someone else’s body and life can be harmful, the less everyone realizes how they might be hurting those around them without knowing it. The statements that I criticized reek of body size privilege and probably able-bodied privilege as well. 

        If you don’t know what privilege means, google “check your privilege”. It will blow your mind. 

  • aarasa

    I saw a snippet of the show with rough translation and
    it was fascinating to see the kind of mentality both the husband and the wife
    has in regards to what constitute as ideal beauty. I said both husband and wife
    because I feel that in a way they both contributed to their own superficial
    minds. Obviously the husband is a shallow, narrow-minded and sexist pig (sexist
    in terms of his stereotyping on what his wife should weight and what he
    considers as beautiful) but a part of me feels that the wife also contributed
    to the way her husband controls her life too.

    The article state that the wife used to weight 75kg and
    is now weight 46kg. That’s a 29kg difference and those weights cannot come off
    in a matter of weeks. It would take some time and during those time I’m sure
    the husband was a complete control freak and micro-managed his wife’s diet as
    much as he is doing now (if not more) So my point is the wife on some level did
    allow the husband to take control of her body (what she can and cannot eat). I
    am in no way shape or form stating that the wife deserve what she got (hell no,
    no one should ever be put in her situation) What I’m trying to say is I think
    the wife did allow (or at least did not refuse her husband micro-managing
    manner) that kind of behavior toward her. However, I feel that the reason
    behind each person’s (the wife and the husband) behavior/mentality is different
    though. The reason behind the husband’s behavior and mentality is….well because
    he’s a jerk and a chauvinistic pig. The wife’s on the other hand I feel that
    her mentality (allowing/not refusing her husband control) was because of social
    and cultural conformity. She might feel pressured to conform to her husband’s
    control over her body because it was expected of her as a wife to respect and
    obey her husband’s wishes. However, I think it had gotten to the point that she
    could no longer tolerate her husband’s control and that’s why she decided to
    speak out on the program. I think it would be really interesting to see what
    happen to the couple after they had appeared on the program, to see if anything
    has change.

    Another point that I
    want to make is about the fact that the husband used UEE as an example of a
    person his wife should emulate and the article talked about using kpop idols as
    role model when it comes to beauty, but I feel that it is a reflection of the
    kind of culture and society South Korea has rather than just the sphere of kpop
    idols. I feel that kpop idols themselves are the product of the kind of culture
    and society that South Korea has (or rather pretty much every nation on earth
    when it comes to skinny vs chubby) It shows what a society values (skinny vs
    chubby, light color skin vs darker color etc.) and society isn’t just about
    kpop idols. Kpop idols themselves are held under the same kind of scrutiny from
    the public when it comes to weight and this proves that it’s actually the
    society’s view on weight/beauty that is the issue not because kpop idols
    project or encourage such unhealthy weight as ideal beauty because they themselves
    are pressured by society (netizen criticizing, newspaper and paparazzi dying to
    publish headline like “XXXX has spark netizen’s attention over his/her weight
    gain”) to maintain such abnormally slim figure too.

  • GreyLeaves

    Case in point. The husband is fucked in the head and the wife needs proper counseling. I find it funny that when cases like this come up. It is 70% of the time men that resemble ogres that demand their wives to be something that they are not. The fact that he tries to play it off like he cares about her health for here own sake, makes it even more sick.

    Honestly, it’s not like he looks like Bi Rain or something. I hope the wife gains self-worth, confidence, freedom, seeks treatment, and makes her husband bend over backwards to look like Bi Rain or something.

    A person can only get so much plastic surgery or lose x amount of weight. If the person doesn’t fix what’s going on in the head than the outer changes are futile in most cases. The focus on appearances in that country is just sad. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=729154428 Chastina Li

    People have different body types and metabolisms at birth, it is unnecessary to mould yourself into that ideal type unless either the nature of your occupation demands it or you want to achieve that yourself. I mean, there is nothing wrong with concerns for body images and the number of South Koreans that do not have the ideal body type is more than one can imagine. So ppl who are over-reacting, stop being fooled around by the media, open your eyes and get rid of that narrow-minded thinking of yours. Despite the negativity associated with excessive concern for physical appearance, there is nothing wrong in pursuing your ideal body type through whatever ways you please. I think the problem here is not about what the ideal body type is, it is about the overly controlling husband and his too obedient wife. There is definitely a tension in their relationship caused by whatever factors, be it financial status or education, the wife can’t stand up to her husband and have to endure the hardships he give her. 

    Even though there is nothing wrong with plastic surgery or dieting, it is sad to see that people in Korea are under so much pressure regarding their appearances that they have to endure pain and hunger to achieve the idea image. I sympathies them but neither me nor anyone else who hasn’t been through it have the right here to bash against Korea and its ppl. 

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/6TJSCCPBRH5TVF6I4EJ4FR7W3A keith

    Overall Kpop industry is one unhealthy business; for the idols and the idol’s followers.

  • likeacrazygirl

    I agree, and that poor woman, what the fuck is wrong with her husband? 101 lbs is lithe already, the poor lady doesn’t need to lose anymore weight, my god.

    K-pop overall is pretty much a very unhealthy business, and yes, the stars exercise excessively and probably eat next to nothing. At least, that’s how it seems, considering they are all in the 40 kgs- early 50 kgs weight range, almost all over 5 feet tall. No offense, I know a few people who have very fast metabolisms (mine isn’t so bad, but I also live with my mom and sister who burn off calories pretty quickly, though not to the point of where they are drastically underweight), but there’s no way that ALL these idol girls have a metabolism that functions at the speed of light. And yes, Asians are more thinly built than Caucasians, or African-Americans, or other ethnicities, but still, these girls are extremely slender. I’m 5’5 and weigh 129 lbs, which is an average, healthy weight. I am not small boned however, nor am I Asian.

    Anyway, I don’t think that they’re setting a very good example for the younger generation in Korea.

  • http://twitter.com/watchTaemdance WatchTaeminDance

    As an Asian living in a world that is exposed to quite a large portion of Western imagery, i feel that there is merit in this article, however i understand that sometimes, it’s not ONLY the husband wanting the scale to go lower. I’m Asian, but i’m not necessarily small boned, nor am i the shortest compared to my peers.
    I’m 18 years old, Asian of medium built with a height of 167cm and weigh 48kg. To non asians, that might make you think that i’m dreadfully skinny, which i can assure you i’m not. Asians do tend to weigh less than their American or European counerparts. It’s not something that is within our control. Very seldom would you see an American or UK girl with my height, weight, and still have proportions of 35-24-35. It’s just an Asian thing. There are many people i know around me that weigh less than me, but at the same time, they are shorter than me. If you’re asian and your’re 46kg,it’s not “Unnaturally skinny”,that’s healthy for anyone who is 165cm or less, . Which they probably are. There’s a different BMI gage for Asians.Also, the ant waist that Goo Hara has, it’s not all that rare. Lot’s of Asian girls have that kind of waistline if they had that built.

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/

  • Kelly SZheng

    I agree with @WatchTaeminDance , asians do tend to be smaller build and weigh a lot lesser than others. In my school, it’s very normal to be around 40-45 kg, and we’re not all underweight-dieting-anorexic-people. It’s really the normal weight, even if we just sit at home and eat all day, at the end of the month we’re normally that weight too. I don’t know why either. But what that you have in weight you have in height, and we usually are shorter so… :/