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Does K-pop make you question your sexuality?

40
Written by On October 12, 2011

I actually read the above as a statement in a forum recently, a post dedicated to the moderator’s adoration of a same-gender idol.

At first, I chuckled.

And then I pondered.

The sexualization of both genders in K-pop has always been a critical point of discussion for those who are either offended or intrigued by its prevalence in Asian entertainment industries. But what about its effect on a viewer’s sexuality? Is it intentional or unintentional?  Does it make a person more aware or make exceptions to their sexual preference?  Is it little wonder, though, considering the overt display of beauty, talent, and brains depicted and immersed in the influential social system that we call K-pop?

We can never be completely immune to the messages projected by the media, especially when it feeds on and reflects the general public’s supposed idealizations and fantasies of perfection. The Lolita, the beastly, the flamboyant, the effeminate girl, the aloof boy, the boy/girl next door, etc. – all of these stereotypes are found in varying degrees among idols and their paraded personalities. Deliberate on the question commonly asked of idols: “What is your ideal type?” What I have always found interesting about this inquiry is that the responses are usually descriptive of the idol[‘is image]; indeed, the “ideal” types are the idols themselves. Idols become exemplars of who we seek for or potentially attracted to, which is furthered by the physical.

This is when sexualization comes into play. For me, the degree to which an idol is sexualized is subjective and based on one’s personal and cultural beliefs, with various other factors thrown into the mix. I believe that there is always a limitation to sexual expression because it exists on a linear plane with sexualization. That is why an individual may perceive the cute/sexy concept of girl groups as small gestures of sexuality while others may feel that the girls are far too sexualized. The amount of ab-flashing by male groups could simply be a display of masculinity or another form of sexual objectification. In either scenario, the common factor is a focal awareness of an idol’s sex, that he or she is someone to be emulated and/or desired.

That varying level of desire is when we come to question our sexuality, and quite an arbitrary point for everyone. K-pop may have simply opened your awareness to another gender, may have confirmed or made into realization your own sexual preference, or may have changed your tolerance or acceptance to different sexual preferences. Or maybe, it merely made you wish you looked half as good as some idols.

At the end of the day, there is something to be desired, I think, that K-pop knows how to bring attention to.

What do you think?

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  • http://hangukarly.tumblr.com triumelephantly

    someone’s been lurking on fandom!secrets

  • Marybassen

    really? wow.. I can honestly say, no,,, never, thought never crossed my mind.  Yeah the girls are pretty but not to that extent

  • eboy07

    Some kpop fan said that he found the kpop boys pretty cute. But that kpop fan is a dude.  Whats up whit that? see how that view towards your own sex is changing before you knew kpop. And the fangirls ha i discovered that it is a higher percentage that are attracted to their kpop girls.

    • Lancerchao

      Me. I’m a straight-as-a-pole guy who finds taemin, Karam, cute. But that was before I found out they were guys

  • Tigana

    No.

  • http://colourmesplendid.wordpress.com Ree

    Oh kpopsecrets. That site will forever be my guilty pleasure. I’ve had more discussions on that site alone than I have-

    anyway. 

    Honestly, I do think the blatant sexualising of stars, not just in the Korean Entertainment industry, but Western too, will have an effect on the way one perceives their own/opposite gender, but not necessarily their sexuality. I do think it’s something people will go through, no matter if they realise it or not. I won’t lie, the sheer amount of my girl crushes have risen since I’ve gotten into Kpop, but I’ve never thought of it in a sexual way. More like I realised, oh wow girls can be really hot, just an awareness that my own gender can be pretty damn good looking. But for other people it can make them question their sexuality to an even larger extent, especially for those people who don’t’ have a full grasp of what way they swing. 

    Also, the fact that with K-Pop there does come that emotional attachment to some idols (which can be healthy/unhealthy depending on the extent), which doesn’t necessarily always come with the sexualization of woman in Western Countries- of course you can be attached, but it isn’t as laid out for you like it is in KPop. That feeling of emotional attachment can make someone ponder over why they love a certain female idol so much. But at the end at he day if the case is thatyou can’t choose your sexuality, then Kpop or not, you’re going to realise one day.

    And there’s that whole issue of barely adolescent teenage girls questioning their sexuality because of Amber. Which can be saved for a whole other OP-ed.

    • http://colourmesplendid.wordpress.com Ree

      This being said. I mean that in regards to people going through genuine self discovery. Not the trolls on kpopsecrets.

  • like’em_cute

    haha my family always question my sexuality. they say all the kpop guys i like are to cute and ‘eww they wear makeup. yep your going to grow up a lesbian’ DX. but u know idk…the guys are really cute and everyones attracted to there own stlye.lol. i like them cute and some like them manly. DX. but im straight. haha. i have that gdragon heartbreaker pic on my wall. T.T n everyone questions if hes a women or a man. T.T im sorry GD. 

  • Sarah Kay

    Many of my no Kpop friends will say the guys I like looks ‘like a girl’ or ‘ is very feminime’. Example being taemin during Korean lucifer promotions!

  • http://www.geekygamergirl.net Jean Park

    Amber seems to be popular in making women question their sexuality. She’s not my type, personally. I admit that certain pictures or music videos of say, Hyori, Victoria or a few SNSD members might make me lean over to one side, but it’s not enough to make me question my sexual preferences. It’s going to take one hell of a woman to do that. Haven’t seen/met her yet.

    I can definitely appreciate their appeal though. If anything, I see the women in Kpop as inspiration for my own style. I admire what they can pull off and what they do to flatter their features or personality and aim for the same. 

  • sophie0364

    It doesn’t make me question my sexuality.  What it does make me question is the continual denial of Korean society to deny the existence of gays – and gay idols, in particular.  Amber of F(x), JoKwon of 2A.M. are just two examples.  Neither will admit to their sexuality – Jo Kwon vehemently denied being gay.  How sad for these kids in the spotlight, having to deny who and what they are.  Fan groups are somewhat responsible – oohing and ahhing over Amber’s style of dress “playing up her feminine style” was one comment from a media outlet included in a fan site.  C’mon people – this girl is a lesbian who prefers guy-style clothes – no amount of fan-gushing is going to change who she is.  Korea seems to be one, big closet, packed full of kids/adults afraid to come out.  Sad and infuriating.

    • kc

      cause man, if you dress and act like a guy it totally means you’re a lesbian.
      you have the misconception that all tomboys like girls, someone’s been eating their ignorant pills lately -.-

    • Gnattie

      You really shouldn’t stereotype people. I don’t think you were trying to be offensive, but you’re coming off that way.

  • Anonymous

    there’s just a difference with sexy and slutty. some of them are very slutty.

  • kc

    It’s never really made me question my sexuality, it has showed me the kind of person I should be with though. before Kpop I was always into the badboy type, the kinda guy that would ditch school/work, swear and smoke…
    but when I started getting into Kpop I slowly started noticing how much nicer it’d be if I went for a more clean cut sweet types.
    since then I’ve been pretty happy with the guys I’ve dated^^

  • Gnattie

    Kpop doesn’t make me question my sexuality. Watching SNSD perform sometimes makes me wonder if I should lose 20 pounds (I weigh 120 lbs), but not if I want to suddenally become a lesbian. People are so freaky. I have no problem with gay people, A LOT of my friends are gay, but I see comments like those above and WORSE on Tumblr all time time. Like, once, this girl posted that she… I’m not going to say. It was gross. It had to do with pleasuring yourself and SNSD’s music videos. For awhile, it made me wonder if Kpop fans were all perverts.

    Another thing, I HATE it when girls refer to Amber as “oppa” or something like that. Amber is my favorite member of F(X) and I love how different she is from the typical cutesy Kpop girl idol. But I don’t think she’s a man. She’s a girl, however androgynous she may be and despite how SM portrays her. Being tomboyish doesn’t automatically make you a lesbian. I don’t think Amber is a lesbian and if she is, who cares? She’d still be my favorite member.

    I think a lot of teenagers are just confusing admiration and lust. I admire the prettiness of Kpop idols and their talents because something inside me wishes I can be pretty and talented and admired. I don’t lust for them, as in I want to get in their pants.

    • Anonymous

      Similarly, Jia made a tweet earlier this year that went like this:

      “‘Stop calling me oppa and Meng Ge … ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜi’m sexy girl~~~~girl~~~~”
      (Meng is her surname and Ge is the Chinese equivalent of oppa)

      I felt really sorry for her. I think she’s a bit androgynous but by no means manly (she has the facial bone structure most girls in the modeling industry would die for)… it just goes to say just HOW feminine the standard for women is in Asia.

    • renee

      I never got it either. I mean if you think about a lot of these people who are
      questioning themselves are question themselves on people who look like the
      opposite gender of themselves. So if you think about it, they’re attracted to
      opposite gender chararacteristics and physicalities not to homogenous ones.

  • http://twitter.com/WishZhu Jie2

    I like pretty things. Kpop makes ‘em pretty, so I like them. It’s aesthetics and has absolutely nothing to do whatsoever with what I want in real life.

    My opinion is if you are you are, and no girly boy and mannish girl can ever change that. There are also hypotheses regarding why straight women like androgynous women, i.e. ‘Takarazuka Revue’. If you are questioning, Kpop is probably just a trigger to the journey of self discovery…

  • springheart

    I have never been turn on by just looking at Kpop stars or even other famous celebrity. I might like them as in a type that i would look for in real life but my sexuality no that’s just creepy. People are just too attach to their stars and fantasies.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jancy-Estrada/100000894873962 Jancy Estrada

    I Love Pretty Boys over overly Masculine Guys.
    I like Pretty boys with a Nice Body with Abs 
    because they remind me of Hot Cute Manga Guys xD So Handsome!
    i compare them because they Both have the androgynous Pretty Boy Look.
    i don’t care what other people say of my taste in men.I still see them has Boys

  • Mer

    Really?  I don’t find any of the K Pop girls attractive.  I mean for the most part they look like prepubescent boys with long hair, shapeless.  Sure some of them have nice faces, but that’s about it.  And like someone one else pointed out, these people are confusing lust with admiration.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Wendy-Serva/1569680191 Wendy Serva

    You need to watch MISSter … is a taiwanese girl group but they look like guys !
    they´re so beautiful girls but really really look like handsome boys :)

    I always question my sexuality because of them !

  • http://twitter.com/flickaddi Felicia Addison

    i know im straight but ill say i have a little lady crush if i really like an idol but i would do that before i got into kpop so no it hasnt made me question my sexuality

  • Em

    Nope… But i do question their sexuality. 

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_YUQWXUQZYSVU6L4TG5GJO6IHYE Ayana Kitayami

    Interesting…^O^
    I’m starting to like this site.
    Anyhow, I admire Idol’s beauty whether it’s a male or a female and I didn’t find myself questioning about my sexuality. BTW, I can’t believe what those posters says O.o 

    • Anonymous

      this site is AWESOME. hehehe

  • Pingback: Idols SHOULD Make You Question Your Sexuality, Dammit! | International Wota

  • Anonymous

    Interesting,especially for us western, I mean, who doesn’t have a friend who told us once “Isn’t he gay?” “They look so gay” etc
    (even my best friend who is gay told me)
    I don’t really define myself, but I’m a girl somewhat in between queer, pansexual and bisexual. And k-pop made me become more men biased, because well, I tend to like women more than men in term of physical aspects.
    I mean, Asian guys are not virile the same way western societies define masculinity, it’s a fact. And that attracts me – a lot.
    If they are less hairy-muscular-whatever do that mean that kpop guys are gay? no, of course! But with a western perspective, I can get why people tend to think this way.
    Thank you Seoulbeats for bringing this subject.

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